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The original was posted on /r/AmItheAsshole by /u/Quiet-Replacement307 on 2023-09-03 20:17:50.

To start, I never actually called her a liar. This happened Friday. My older brother has been seeing his girlfriend for a few months. I’ll be honest right now and tell you guys there was something I couldn’t put my finger on about her, because I just couldn’t like her. I am never mean to her though. I’m the only one in my family that my brother is comfortable introducing me to his new girlfriends because I don’t judge, so I did keep my thoughts to myself. I got to know her a little better through the months and those thoughts never really changed.

Friday I got a text from her asking if we could talk. I wasn’t quite sure what to expect in this talk, but I said sure. That evening she come over and said my brother was upset with her but wouldn’t tell her why. I asked what had happened up to the moment he got upset with her. She told me that she told him she was pregnant and that’s when he got upset and shut down. He refused to talk to her and told her to leave. This is where I could be the ah. My Exact words were, “he’s upset because you either cheated or you’re not pregnant, because my brother can’t have kids. He was tested when his ex wife and him tried having kids and it is him who is infertile.” She looked like a deer caught in headlights. She denied that she cheated or is lying about it. I just said “ok, well that’s most likely why he’s upset. Expect a paternity test when you have the baby. Congratulations by the way.”

After she left she text me that I’m a b word and that my brother should have been the one to tell her that information at the beginning of their relationship, not me. I told her that it was her who asked me a question and I answered it honestly. My brother confirmed with her, and then me, that is exactly why he’s upset. She still claims she didn’t cheat and she’s not lying.

My family is mostly on my side, except my sister. My sister said that it could still be my brother’s and I’m an ah for basically calling her a liar. Then she added that I shouldn’t be giving out my brother’s health information without his consent. I did ask my brother if he was upset with me for ripping that bandaid and telling his gf his health info, but he says he’s not mad at me and that me telling her helped him. He said he couldn’t tell her himself because of how hurt he is that she either cheated or is lying. He 100% cannot have children, so if she’s pregnant then it’s not his kid.

Am I the AH for telling my brother’s gf she’s a liar?

Edit Update! I don’t know how to do update posts here, so I made an edit to let you guys know what happened!

My brother came over to talk and is staying for dinner tonight.

She didn’t live with him, but had stuff at his house, so when he let her come over to get her stuff, they talked.

She actually came clean right off the bat. At the beginning of the week they had their first argument. To my brother, the argument was settled, done and over with in the same night, but to her she was insecure and thought they were going to breakup. What better way to keep a guy than to tell him she’s pregnant? So she lied about being pregnant.

But that’s not all. My brother reminded her that he did in fact tell her that he is sterile, I was wrong with the words, on their second or third date. (He said it depends on what you call a date, because this was more of a hang out at his house, not go out to eat type of date). You guys…She told him she remembered it as he was sad that he couldn’t have kids with his ex wife because they divorced, not “couldn’t have kids at all and that’s what led to the divorce.” He said it felt like she was actually trying to argue to where he had to log into his patient portal and show her the test results to get her to stop. Then after that, she was still trying to keep that blame on him telling him it was up to him to make sure she knew what he meant. Even though she admitted to lying about all of this, she couldn’t possibly hold more blame than him. It doesn’t even make sense typing it out, but it makes sense to her.

I asked if they were still together and he said he can’t be with someone who could lie about that AND try to blame him for her lying.

I told him he dodged a hell of a bullet.