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The original was posted on /r/AmItheAsshole by /u/DesignerAnimal613 on 2023-09-02 19:32:57.
My son (we’ll call him Jack Emmett Smith) was born just over 6 months ago and we decided to use my grandfather’s name (Emmett) as his middle name to honor him and because I have always been close to my grandfather. My sister in law is now pregnant with their second child unexpectedly after her first just had her first birthday. There will be about a 19 month age gap between them.
The big thing here is that they already announced the name of the baby when she is only a month along. The name, is the same name as my grandfather and my son’s middle name- Emmett.
They already announced this to both sides of her family and announced that they won’t even be calling her by that name but by a nickname for her entire childhood.
My brother with all of this doesn’t really care what they name the kids and really just lets my sister-in-law decide what she wants, which is fine. But the fact that they announced the name and never even talked to us about it beforehand and we only found out due to a group chat text stings especially since my son is barely 6 months old.
My sister-in-law struggles with severe mental health issues and I honestly don’t know if I can bring this up to her without her having a complete meltdown and her end up thinking that we hate her and so on and so on.
I spoke to my mother about it and she said that she thinks it’s great that we all like the same name and that name’s take on a different meaning for everyone and that it is completely fine. (My mother has also had to go through a lot of struggles in her relationship with my SIL due to the mental health struggles and all sorts of issues there).
WIBTA for telling my sister-in-law that she needs to change the name of her unborn child because it is too soon after my own son being born?