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The original was posted on /r/twoxchromosomes by /u/One_Ninja6748 on 2023-08-30 19:36:27.

I’ve (37F) been with my husband (43M) for 16 years. I’ve been a stay at home mom since our first year anniversary.

When we met, I was clear about the fact that I didn’t finish high school and that eventually, I would like to go back, get my high school diploma and go to university. At the time I wasn’t exactly sure of what I wanted to do. While pregnant, becoming a hairdresser seemed to be a good idea. I never took the course because I didn’t meet the requirements. I decided to wait a bit before going back to school because my pregnancy was complicated.

Fast forward a few years down the line , every time I brought up the fact that I wanted to go back to school, he would tell me we couldn’t afford it and that I wouldn’t get any government help because I am over 30.

This gets me to where we are today. We were talking about our kids school and how there was alot of teachers missing from school and how some classes didn’t have a permanent teacher yet.

For the past 3 years, I’ve been a parent volunteer at school and I caught the bug. I love being in a school setting. Teachers around me have been encouraging me to go back to school and get my diploma and go to university for my teaching degree.

He thinks that at 37, it’s a waste of time. That I won’t succeed because we have a family… He thinks that financially me going back to school would ruin us more than we are now.

When I talk about finding an actual job (and NOT helping him with his job - building management) he keeps telling me it’s not the time to talk about it.

Every time I bring up going to school, he bring up his ex and a 10K loan that he took out for her, that she barely paid back. That she never went to her classes and wasted his money.

It annoys me. Why won’t he encourage me to get a job and go back to school instead of always seeing the negative side of things? Why does he keep comparing what I want to do with what his ex did 20 years ago?