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The original was posted on /r/AmItheAsshole by /u/Odd-Breaker on 2023-08-29 20:14:57.
I’ll provide the context and then what happened. So I (27M) have been married to my wife Chloe (28F) for 4 years and we have a 2 year old. Overall we have an awesome relationship, we are really best friends and I trust her with everything.
I am estranged from my family which includes my older sisters Margaret (31F) and Molly (29F). Basically about 7 years ago my sister married to Brandon. Me and Brandon became pretty good friends but 4 years ago my sister cheated on him with her now husband. I was shocked to see how my family flipped on him. We were on vacations with this guy one week and the next week he’s an asshole and was a bad match for my sister. It was appalling how my parents backed her and tried to cover it up whenever it was brought up.
When my sister got engaged again I was living states away. I was invited to participate and I said I couldn’t. I wasn’t supporting a sham marriage and didn’t feel like dropping hundreds of dollars traveling or taking time off work. I told my parents this and they exploded. I told them if they wanted to pay for my ticket to come in the day of then sure, but they refused. I said they would pay for another wedding but not a plane ticket? They got upset and I didn’t show. I was then not invited to Christmas that year as they said it was too much drama because my sisters and I were not speaking.
I got married 3 years ago. Brandon was a groomsman and my family exploded when they found out. They said it was disrespectful that I gave my oldest sister a solo invite when she was married. My parents said they wouldn’t help me out with the wedding. I told them to keep their money because they weren’t getting invited then because it was my event and they got no say on the guest list. I’ve not spoken to them since. I got invited back to Christmas this year but I think that’s just because I have a kid now.
When I met Chloe I told her this dynamic and warned her that I would not be having family support. She was incredibly supportive. Well the last few months she’s been changing things up. Our son was baptized and she asked if I wanted to invite my parents. My sisters sent me an invite to an event and I threw it in the trash. She pulled it out and asked if I wanted to do. She also friended my sisters on social media and comments on their stuff. Multiple other instances but the one that set me off was when she asked to invite my parents over for thanksgiving this year. I exploded. I told her she knew what she signed up for. And it was wrong what she was doing. She said that her family is so close (she has a huge family, 4 siblings) that she feels like I’m missing something. I snapped and said my family isn’t her family. My family is her and our kid. End of discussion and that I was leaving. Went golfing and cooled off. She’s texted me a few times half ass apologizing. But she doesn’t think she did anything wrong. I told her to keep playing these games and see where it gets her. AITA?