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The original was posted on /r/AmItheAsshole by /u/CranberryStrict2385 on 2023-08-29 18:12:06.
I am a 29 (F) and my husband is 27 (M), and we have a very healthy and happy marriage. There is a girl, we will call her Amanda 23 (F), who has had feelings for my husband since high school. He has repeatedly told her that he was not interested in being in a relationship with her for years. In 2020, one year before we met, they had sex one time and never did anything after that.
Fast forward a couple years later, his best friend (the bride) from high school is getting married and Amanda is the maid of honor and my husband is a groomsmen. I was a little uncomfortable since I knew the past between Amanda and my husband, but I trust my husband to not do anything so I sucked it up and decided to be civil for the wedding events. Two months before the wedding, Amanda decided to message my husband twice asking him if she could be his sneaky link and that I did not need to find out. Thankfully on both occasions, my husband told her that he will not betray my trust like that and he will never ever consider cheating on me, and to never message him again. Amanda decided to gaslight my husband saying that “he ain’t shit” and all kind of other derogatory things.
My husband and I decided to talk to his best friend and her fiancé about the situation, and how uncomfortable it made us that she tried to get my husband to cheat on me. We told her that I will not be going to the bachelorette party to avoid any drama but I will still attend the wedding and I will be civil so the bride and groom can still enjoy their day. A few days later, the maid of honor texted both me and my husband cussing us out for talking to the bride and her fiancé about what she did, and that we were selfish for trying to ruin the wedding events and wedding itself. She also commented that it doesn’t matter what she does because she was the best friend of the bride.
At that point, I couldn’t contain my anger towards her anymore and I let her have a piece of my mind. The conversation ended in me telling her “How sad of a person do you have to be to try and have sex with people who are already in a relationship? Like are you really having that hard of a time to get your own man? But I guess no one wants to be in a relationship with the town whore”.
After the fight between me and the maid of honor. His best friend (the bride) messaged my husband about the drama that was going on. They had a big blow up fight because the bride was unwilling to just talk to her Maid of Honor to stop trying to talk to my husband. The end result was that my husband stepped down as a groomsmen and cut off all communication with the entire friend group.
I feel so bad that my husband felt like he had to walk away from his entire friend group. So am I the asshole for fighting with the maid of honor, one to two months away from the wedding? Should I have just sucked up my pride and continued to be civil?