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The original was posted on /r/AmItheAsshole by /u/Throwaway-8841 on 2023-08-29 15:03:51.
I (55M) have a daughter (29F) who is getting married next year. I was an involved dad when she was young and we were close. But when she was in her teens I cheated on her mother. My daughter didn’t accept the divorce well. What she didn’t and still doesn’t understand is while her mother might be the best mother in her eyes, my ex wasn’t the perfect wife. I’m not saying what I did was right and I’m not trying to wiggle out of accepting responsibility for my decision to cheat. If I had a chance to do things differently I would’ve divorced her mother first. It took me years of counselling to get over PTSD from my ex wife’s emotionally abusive behaviour. I tried my best to stay in my daughter’s life but since she was old enough to decide, court couldn’t enforce visitation. I paid child support and extra on top for extra curriculars. I was involved in her life as much as she would let me. Periodically I would reach out and kept the door open. We catch up once in a while.
Now, last catch up she tells me she’s getting married. I know of him but I’ve never been introduced to her fiancé. I won’t receive an invite to her wedding. But she asked if I can contribute. This just rubs me the wrong way. I want to support her, I really do. But I’m sick of being her wallet. I told her I would think about it and she said I suck as a dad if I don’t support her. AITA for not forking out for the wedding? I’m at the point where I just want to remove her from my will and leave everything to my nieces and nephews.