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The original was posted on /r/AmItheAsshole by /u/No_Refuse_4704 on 2023-08-29 02:59:19.
I have been with my wife since university, we have been together for 14 years married for 8. My practice has been doing very well, and I do have joint finances with my wife. We have recently been arguing more about money. I am a frugal person when it comes to things materialistic items. I am all for spending on trips and adventures and we do so often. I just despise spending money on items that overly show my wealth. My wife has made claims that it is unfair and embarrassing that we live the way we do. She wants to be more in line with her friends.
I have told her countless times that is simply not my style, I am fine with what we have I do not need to show off or prove something to others. I do understand and see people do talk about us but I just don’t care. Should I have listened to my wife’s pleas and given her the finer things so to speak so she would feel more included or less of an outcast?
Edit: Thanks for all the replies, and insight. I will speak with her in the morning and try to come up with a compromise. Maybe I will suggest she can go back to work part-time. I will still cover every joint expense and the money she gets from work she can use however she sees fit.