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The original was posted on /r/twoxchromosomes by /u/BisquickandWaffles on 2023-08-28 21:42:53.
I know I’m not alone in feeling gaslit by medical professionals and I hope someone can learn from my stubbornness and advocate better for themselves. I’m very lucky that I am an overall healthy individual and I generally have a very high threshold for pain. I had my first run in with a non believing doctor as a teenager. I was rushing through my house getting ready for school when I felt a sharp pain in my foot. I looked down, saw nothing, and went back to trying to frantically get ready for school. With each footstep the pain intensified and the pain started moving up my leg. There wasn’t a single mark on my foot so the pain made no sense. I put my big girl pants on and headed to school, assuming the pain would eventually subside. It didn’t. When I got to school and tried to walk, I had to hold back tears. I’m not about to cry in public so I left and went to my grandmas who decided to take me to urgent care. The doctors were frustrated I wasn’t able to tell them exactly what I had stepped on and assured me whatever it was would naturally push its way out. I couldn’t walk, the pain was all the way up my leg and throbbing. After some convincing, they FINALLY agreed to start cutting my foot open to see if they could see anything. The numbing shots in my foot were awful, and the doctors had the audacity to ask me if the pain was worth it to find a “splinter”. I told them they could cut it open or amputate. They start cutting and get to the point where they tell me if they were to cut anymore they would need to get a specialist because it would be considered foot surgery and again try and tell me I’m being dramatic and whatever it is will push it’s way out. I tell them get me the specialist and they again try and talk me out of it. The foot specialist shows and he tries to “talk some sense into me” and treats me like an over dramatic teen girl looking for attention. I tell him the same thing I told the other doctors, amputate or cut but I’m not leaving until the pain stops. He starts cutting and the room is now filled with nurses who are all chit chatting amongst themselves, I’m probably reading to much into this part but it felt like they were there to watch this over dramatic teen girl be taught some sort of lesson. After a short while, the pain is suddenly gone and the room goes dead silent. I look up and everyone’s jaw is on the floor. In this doctors hand, a toothpick. He tells me, “I suppose that would hurt”. The toothpick had gone in at an angle and was parallel to the bottom of my foot. Not one person believed my pain. I’m now well past my teens and avoided doctors because of this, only regularly seeing my gyno. My gyno had noted she thought my thyroid was enlarged and encouraged me to have it tested and get a primary care doctor established. I heeded those warnings for years until my mom was diagnosed with thyroid cancer. I decided it was time to get a primary care doctor and start getting annual physicals in addition to checking my thyroid. I saw FIVE different doctors and each one only wanted to give me a pap, when I pushed for a physical, they asked why I would need one…. I expressed my concerns and also pointed out physicals are covered annually by my insurance. They told me I was young and healthy and I’d leave because I just don’t think I should have to argue to get medical care. I started to get what felt like ear infections regularly so I went to urgent care. This doctor was the answer to all my problems. He was genuinely concerned for my health and was baffled my thyroid hadn’t been tested given it’s visible size. He set me up with all the tests and luckily, not cancer. The battle didn’t stop there though. Due to the size, it was recommended I follow up in a year and keep an eye on it. Over the year it DOUBLED in size. It’s now starting to hurt when I swallow and the ear pain hasn’t subsided. My endo suggests looking into having my thyroid removed and puts me in touch with an ENT. This ENT hits me with the classic line, “you’re young and healthy” and it’s clear he’s not interested in my issues. When I tell him it hurts to swallow he tells me the thyroid isn’t the problem. I ask what I should do to find the problem and he advised to see a primary care doctor…. I discuss my ear pain and again, see the primary. His biggest opposition to removing the thyroid is that I’d be left with a scar, he repeated that so many times. He did provide VERY valid reasons not take it out but really seemed to focus on the scar, something I was was NOT concerned with. I tried discussing at what point we do consider taking it out if it keeps growing at the rate it’s going, he shrugs me off and tells me it’s not hurting anything and many people live with enlarged thyroids. I leave and live with the pain for another three years before I find an amazing primary care doctor that actually cares. She sets me up with a new ENT that runs several tests the other ENT couldn’t be bothered to run because I’m “young and healthy”. My thyroid has now tripled in size and the scans show the thyroid is in fact pressing on my esophagus and has been causing my ear pain and has grown into my chest. Removal is now necessary and the risks are far more substantial. Moral of the story, don’t be stubborn and advocate for yourself! Waiting can make things worse.