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The original was posted on /r/AmItheAsshole by /u/Aware-Lead-8496 on 2023-08-28 17:42:10.

I (19F) lost a bit of weight, I’m finally at a happy, healthy weight for myself. I saw my brother (35) after a few months and he looked me up and down and said “You lost your ass, used to be bigger” and also said “What happened to your jugs?” then laughed. I looked at my mom and she didn’t say anything. I just sat down. My family is full of outspoken and weird people, it’s basically a norm. Nobody reacts to these sorts of comments. I think it’s weird for anybody, especially family of the opposite sex to comment such a thing. After we left i told my mom that (my brother) is a perv… she said “No he isn’t” “Don’t say that” so i just kept quiet. AITAH for calling him a perv? Is this normal in other families?

UPDATE: As of 30 seconds ago i texted my brother and told him

“Remember when you made those comments about my body last time i saw you? Do you wanna maybe not do that next time? A “good job” or nothing at all would be lovely. THANKS.”

I’m currently shaking. Hopefully he doesn’t call my mom twisting what i said, and i get chewed out by her for standing up for myself. For once. In the past, if i ever talked back to him, he’d beat me pretty bad, but now that I’m an adult, if he so much as threatens me i have no issue filing a report.

UPDATE 2: He texted me back and said

“I’m coming over after work and we can figure this out. Bring mom.” 😟😟😟

Um what??? Now he’s trying to involve OUR MOM in hopes she’ll take HIS defense and then probably call me out for feeling uncomfortable by HIS comment. This is what i wanted to avoid. I don’t want this man coming to my place?? But he will anyways. I knew this was going to happen. He literally cannot defend his comment because in no way, shape, or form is that “normal” or ok to blurt out to somebody. I don’t understand what he’s trying to do by seeing me.

I texted him back and said:

“There’s really nothing to figure out i just don’t want you to make comments about my body. A simple “good job” or nothing is good enough and that goes for anybody. Thanks.”

🙁🙁🙁

UPDATE 3: He called my mom. Like i knew he would. He said if i didn’t want to hear comments about my body, i should’ve worn different clothes. I was wearing Hollister jeans and a T shirt. He also said “It’s not weird at all you’re just a stuck up brat.” I told my mom not to let him come to my place because if he touches me again, I’m calling the cops. I told my mom how his comments made me uncomfortable, she said “Alright. I agree.” but this started a huge fight with my brother. He’s really angry.

UPDATE 4: I didn’t expect to get so many comments, I’m trying to respond to them all. You guys are so kind in helping me navigate this situation THANK YOU ALL SO MUCH. I really don’t have many options of help when it comes to my family, so this means a lot.

My mom told me that my brother called her again, she told him to “knock it off”. He’s getting mad at her for “not understanding”. He wants her to defend him but i don’t think she is. I don’t know why he included her in this… He is a grown man pushing 40 and shouldn’t need our mom’s help in order to say his fault and just accept my boundaries…? i don’t understand it. He’s only mad because i said something… i spent my whole childhood being abused my him, not anymore. I don’t think he’s gonna come over but i’ll update in case. Thank you to whoever sent me an anonymous hotline resource. You’re an angel.