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The original was posted on /r/AmItheAsshole by /u/incrayjocks on 2023-08-11 12:59:01.
I (28, male) worked at a bakery for about 6 months. We would just sort and bake pre-baked stuff and sell it to our customers and if needed, give them advice to what kind of bread they would prefer. It was my first job as a salesperson.
We had a whatsapp group, where we would receive important information about the business or incoming changes. But some of the older ladies would use the group to vent about other co-workers. Which was fine, because they are old and our boss was one of them.
In my first week I had the closing shift with one of my younger co-workers, Sarah (22, female). We tried to leave the place as clean as possible. Since I was new and Sarah was a trainee we weren’t able to finish all of our tasks punctually, but at least the important ones, like doing the invoice and depreciation. We also cleaned all the vending shelfs and the bread cutter.
Now imagine waking up to your furiously vibrating phone and seeing one of the older ladies, Iris (56, female) writing: “The bakery looks terrible! This is not acceptable!” I responded: “Is it possible for you to say that in a more constructive way?” That was when Iris got defensive and wrote stuff like “That was constructive! I don’t know what the issue is. I told you what was wrong, you need to learn!” Since I was treated terrible at my traineeship years before that job, I honestly wouldn’t let that kind of stuff slide anymore. So I answered: “First of all, you didn’t say what was “terrible” and second, you knew I had closing shift yesterday, so why would you write it in the group instead of explaining my mistakes to me in private?” The older ladies became defensive, too. One of them told me to instantly come to my workplace so she can show me.
It was flour. Not even a bunch of flour, but flour dust on the coffee machine.
Still, I apologized to Iris, because I still was a Newbie and she clearly was too sensitive for such a fight. Her reaction to my apology made me think it was over.
She literally quit the job the next day. She was employed for over 10 years. She told everyone that my misbehaviour as a younger generation made her uncomfortable and I didn’t have any respect towards her as an older person. The other ladies came over that day to have a talk. They all said the same and were mad at me.
That was when I snapped and told them: “If a grown woman decides to quit a job because of that, it is not my fault. If a grown adult is not able to take the bavklash of their behaviour, it is not my problem. And if y’all want my respect, you better start respecting me, too. Because I don’t care about your age, we earn the same amount of money and have the same rank. You earn what you sow.”
So, am I the asshole?