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The original was posted on /r/AmItheAsshole by /u/chaddjohnson on 2023-08-10 23:27:14.
My fiancé (33F) and I (38M) live together in a shared apartment. We cannot have sex during the day because her daughter constantly walks into our room without knocking – even when the door is closed. I’ve asked my fiancé to ask her daughter to knock, but she hasn’t listened.
None of the bedroom doors currently have locks. I suggested changing the door handle to our room to one that has a lock so that we can lock the door for 30 minutes during the daytime and have sex sometimes. Currently we can only have sex in the evenings, and that’s rare because her daughter fights with her often and refuses to go to sleep, so my fiancé is exhausted when she finally comes to bed. I’m totally understanding of this, and I’m trying to suggest other options…such as the lock.
When I suggested the lock idea, she got upset and adamantly said no because her daughter would freak out and get really upset if she couldn’t see her mom whenever she needed her. I argued that her daughter needs to learn to deal with this and that we need the ability to have some privacy for ourselves sometimes.
We’re both quiet when we have sex, our bed makes no noise, and we can turn on music or a TV so she doesn’t hear. And her daughter is 8.
AITA for suggesting we put a lock on our door so that we can have some time to ourselves sometimes?