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The original was posted on /r/twoxchromosomes by /u/JayJayDoubleYou on 2023-08-09 19:08:06.
I’m writing this here to vent and lament.
Some backstory, I’m 25F, my sisters are about a decade older than me and they’re my half sisters. Their dad is not my dad, we share a mom. Their dad is also mega-wealthy and has certainly shaped my perspective on billionaires and if they deserve what they have. We’ll call him M.
I’ve only met him three times. The first, at my eldest sisters wedding, I was applying to colleges. He told me if I didn’t get into one I wanted to give him a call, with a wink. I said ok and left him, told my dad. My dad gave me great advice then which was “When someone offers you a deal like that, they’re going to want something in return. Do you want to owe him anything?” I did not speak to M again until my other sisters wedding years later.
The second time we met was uneventful. My mom kept crying because the wedding was at M’s house so I just avoided him.
The third time we met, though, my sister got remarried in France. We were getting ready before the wedding, I was holding her baby so she could get her dress on. M comes and sits down next to me. It’s his granddaughter too, so, fine I guess. He asks me immediately if I am “of the age to get baby fever”.
Um, WHAT? M is above 65 I think so I just brushed it off. I said yes, because I do want a baby, and I didn’t want to start an argument about controlling ones biological urges, especially because he has like seven kids and four divorces. I just wanted to help my sister out.
He keeps pressing. He rambled for a minute about how I’m of a good age, and I will have no problem finding a partner, which he ends saying 'because you’re such a low mileage vehicle, right?". EW.
First, what does that mean? Did he assume I have a low body count? Which, I don’t, for my age and my peer group, I consider myself sexually liberated. I mean, I had an abortion when I was sixteen, I have rarely have had a good experience telling my partner my body count, I have fricking blue hair and tattoos and stretched earlobes, do I look like a Good Catholic Woman? What would make someone think that of me? I think I would be less offended if he called me a slut, at least that’s more accurate.
Also, does he only think “low mileage women” are acceptable partners? His daughter (not my sister’s my sister’s sister who I treat as a cousin) is 18 and she hates him, I wonder why. I know this is common among men, but I would never at this age date a man who felt insecure because of my past. That’s a red flag, but a man with four divorces probably doesn’t know much about red flags.
And another thing, which is shameful this is not my immediate response but there’s so much to unpack here- I’m not a fucking vehicle. I’m not sitting on a lot waiting for some man to select me and impregnate me. I have agency. I, unlike M, would never agree to marry someone without spending years vetting them and building a foundation. Is that how it’s worked for him? My mom was nineteen when they met, she lived with her parents in her hometown, she was disabled most of her early childhood, I understand the mistake she made in marrying him. And she grew up and divorced him. But, this whole time, has he seen her as a car? That he bought new and sold to someone else, and now he views her as a used vehicle? Am I the new model?
When he said that, I laughed and picked up my niece and walked away. What a weirdo. Apparently he never got over my mom, who was his first wife. He also at this wedding went up to my grandma (mom’s side) and said “I still remember your address and phone number.”.
Part of me feels sad for him, part of me feels sad for his new girlfriend because she seemed like a really nice lady. Most of me feels awful for his kids- I mean I was helping his blacked out 18 year old son get back to his hotel by himself. My sister’s, of course, I feel awful for, they’re his oldest and they could write a novel on the shit he’s put them through, primarily via neglect. I told my family what he said to me and they rolled their eyes, like yup, that’s M for you.
I guess my vent is over, it’s just so gross to me. It wouldn’t happen if I wasn’t female presenting. My aunt speculated that M is so obsessed with my mom, now that I am visually not a minor any more, his obsession extends to her offspring. That’s fucking weird the more you think about it.
I’m sure tons of you people have gross and weird family members. I’m wondering if any of you also have creepy family members that you’re not directly biologically related to and if they are extra weird towards you. At least maybe we can share in our misery.