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The original was posted on /r/AmItheAsshole by /u/Distinct_League_4783 on 2023-08-05 07:16:34.
My 27f friend 30F is engaged to be married, before she even got engaged we’ve always talked about being each others brides maid and so when she got engaged I was an automatic yes,
Her wedding kept on getting pushed back for the past 2 years but we have a final date
Her wedding is child free and is 6 hours away which wouldn’t normally be an issue,
Except a couple months ago my daughter got sick, she has a major surgery 4 weeks before the wedding
I don’t feel comfortable being 6 hours away from her that soon and if all goes well she should be able to travel So l planned to take her with me on the wedding trip
Not to the actual wedding but to the city, my mom will be taking care of her so I’ll be free but I’ll be close enough to her in case I need to leave urgently.
When my friend found out I was bringing my daughter, she was mad, she said that she wanted a child free weekend, where we can all let loose and just have fun.
I assured her that my child wouldn’t even be around but she still insisted that if I bought my child my attention will be divided, she suggested I just leave my child at home with my mom and when I refused she lost it
She started calling me a bad friend, saying I don’t respect her or value our friendship, my child is adopted and she made a comment that daughter was fine for x amount of years without you. She’ll be okay for a week.
This annoyed me and so I said fine, since you don’t want my attention to be split I’m dropping out of your wedding, I’ll come as a guest if you want but nothing more. She then started crying, calling me mean and saying that if drop out, we can no longer be friends.
I stood my ground, since then she’s had the other bridesmaids and other people in the wedding party, trying to guilt me into coming back, people saying it’s her big day and that I should be there for her, she herself hasn’t apologized but others have apologized on her behalf however I’ve stuck to my decision but I’m starting to question If I reacted too harshly.