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The original was posted on /r/twoxchromosomes by /u/Routerwifi123 on 2023-08-04 06:09:16.
My husband (30M) and I (28F) are about to close on a house in a few days. The house is mostly move-in ready, but there are certain things we discussed wanting to change (refinishing floors, painting walls, building pantry, renovating bathroom, etc.). Also we’ll need to buy all the furniture since we don’t have any yet. I imagine it’ll be an incredibly overwhelming process at the beginning, especially for 1st time homebuyers like us.
Today, I had a conversation with my husband about our plans for the new house. He expressed that he doesn’t feel like working on the things we talked about before. His reasoning is that he’d already started a project last year to help his brother finish his basement, which still hasn’t been completed. He thinks that he should prioritize that first before working on our new house.
In response, I suggested that his brother can either wait for us to move in and settle down, or he could hire someone to finish the work (considering he has the means to do so). However, my husband firmly believes that siblings are supposed to support each other and insisted on finishing the project he started before doing anything else.
While I don’t have a problem with him helping his brother, I can’t help but feel upset that our plans for our new home might be put on hold. Am I being selfish for wanting him to prioritize on our own house first?
Tl;dr: I and my husband are closing on our first house; my husband says he doesn’t want to work on any of the house projects we’ve been planning on because he needs to help his brother finish his basement first. Am I being unreasonable for thinking our own house should come first?