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The original was posted on /r/AmItheAsshole by /u/aitashoppingtrip on 2023-08-01 18:20:13.
My husband has 2 girls from a previous marriage, Addison (12) and Madeline (9). He and his ex broke up when she was pregnant with Madeline and we started dating shortly after. I have been in the girls life since Addison was 3 and Madeline was 6 months. We have primary custody during the school year. During the summer, they do 3 weeks with us, 1 week at their bio mom’s house.
Their bio mom has a 10 year old stepdaughter, Lauren, that can be a bit of a bully. Madeline is very shy and has some sensory issues and minor developmental and speech delays so she’s seen as an easy target for Lauren. All 3 girls share a room so Madeline doesn’t really have an escape from Lauren.
Last time I picked the girls up, Madeline ran to me and said that Lauren took a lot of her clothes and toys and wouldn’t give them back. Their bio mom said Madeline gave them to Lauren but Addison confirmed that Lauren did take them from Madeline. I was able to get a couple things back, like her favorite pajamas and stuffed animal but Lauren and their bio mom wouldn’t give anything else back.
Their bio mom’s house is very close to two very nice malls. I think it’s also important to mention that my husband and I are much more well off than their bio mom and her husband. When Lauren and the girls bio mom wouldn’t give the rest of Maddie’s stuff back, I promised the girls a shopping spree at the nearby malls. Lauren said she wants to come, but I told her that she just got a lot of new clothes and toys so she doesn’t need to go. She gave a lot more of Maddie’s stuff back and asked if I could take her now but the answer was still no.
Lauren threw a temper tantrum and the girls bio mom has decided I am no longer welcome at her house and that she will only release the girls to their dad (which is against the custody order). My husband is defending me to their bio mom but he is saying I was petty and I shouldn’t have done that.