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The original was posted on /r/AmItheAsshole by /u/Creepy_Safe_7930 on 2023-08-01 17:43:35.
I’ll try to keep things brief but tbh I don’t get where my friend is coming from here and I need an outside opinion. So, my parents own a beach house which my friend, Jess (F25), her boyfriend, Harry (M26) and myself (F25) were planning on going to for a week. Our road trip there is coming up in less than two weeks and this morning Jess texted me to ask if her friend, Heather, can come as well. Turns out her friend is going through a breakup and Jess thought bringing her to the beach house would be a good solution to cheer her up. The thing is, the place is pretty small, my parents bought it for themselves and so it’s a one bedroom and already as three people the place was going to be pretty cramped with Jess and Harry sleeping in the living room. I told her about this and she said that we can make it work and that Heather can bring her own air mattress and that she won’t take up much room. I told Jess I felt as though this might be awkward as I’ve never met Heather before and she’ll basically have to tag along with us everywhere as well as go for the 5 hour road trip. Jess told me that Heather won’t be a problem and is very nice.
I initially reluctantly agreed to this because it didn’t seem like Jess would take no for an answer but I guess I gave off the vibe that I wasn’t okay with this because Jess went on to ask if I was actually feeling good about this. I told her that honestly having a stranger I never met invited to a trip I’ve been looking forward to is a real downer on my trip. On top of that, she’s going to have to come to everything with us because I only have the one set of keys and I don’t want to trust a stranger on her own with the keys. I ended up telling her that ideally, I wouldn’t want Heather there but that Jess seemed as though she had already invited her and so we’ll make it work. Jess is now mad at me saying that I should have just been upfront and that now things are going to be awkward on our trip and that she can’t uninvite Heather.
I probably could have been more upfront but I feel as though I brought up valid reasons as to why she would be a bad fit on the trip and in general I feel as though it’s poor etiquette to try and invite a stranger to someone elses house at the last minute.