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The original was posted on /r/AmItheAsshole by /u/Complete_North_8446 on 2023-08-01 00:24:40.

Throwaway account for privacy.

I (M25) have been in a relationship with Amy (F23) since nearly 3 years, and we started to live together 2 months ago in my apartment. I love her and everything was going well until this argument.

I am very lucky to be born in a rich family, so my parents used to have a maid to do the housework, Maria (57F). She has been working for my parents since I’m 7 and became a family friend. For example we were all invited to the wedding of her daughther.

Last year, my parents took a well deserved retirement and enjoy some trips, visit family etc, so since last year, they have spent very little time at home, so Maria didn’t have much work to do in their home. My parents proposed to have Maria as a maid for my apartment. I gladly approved because I love Maria, and usually I am very tired after work, so it is nice to have someone to take care of the home. Maria was also happy to keep working for us. My parents insisted to cover the whole wage of Maria until the end of my residency, even if I could do it (she earns about 2.5 times minimal salary in my country)

Amy comes from a more modest background and doesn’t understand the principle of having a maid. She doesn’t want Maria to iron her clothes, or tidying her stuff. I thought she wasn’t used too but Amy seems to dislike Maria for some reason. Here is the conflict : yesterday, Maria came to work and especially clean the bathroom, Amy was supposed to be at work, but she was showering and didn’t put the lock, you know the rest. Amy got angry at Maria and yelled at her. Maria called me to explain me the incident, she told me she apologized and tried to say she thought Amy was at work that she rang the bell before entering with her key.

When I came home, Amy was still angry, she says Maria is sneaky and creepy and that I should fire and we should just split chores. I try to calm her down and told that maybe she was overreacting, but she is having none of it. Honestly, I don’t want to ditch Maria, I have total trust in her, she is almost family to me, also, I know I sound a bit lazy but, both Amy and I have pretty demanding jobs so dealing with chores after work would be tiring. Furthermore, it would without doubt upset my parents. I tried to explain all of this to Amy but she called me an egoistical and lazy AH, she said that I choose Maria instead of her and her comfort. She is now giving me the cold shoulder.

I feel bad about this, I talked about it with my friends. Some sides with me but a few also say that I am in the wrong, I’m a bit torn.

So AITA ?