link to original reddit post by /u/omgcoin
A fragment from "Heart of a Dog" - divide it equally (english subtitles):
https://youtu.be/aOE_3_Ws4y0?t=5010
The context:
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Heart_of_a_Dog
"Heart of a Dog" is a biting satire of bolshevism written by Mikhail Bulgakov in 1925 during NEP, a period when communism appeared to be relaxing in the Soviet Union.
The professor:
An old intellectual from Tsarist era, excellent surgeon and anti-communist. His frequent medical treatment of the CPSU leadership makes him untouchable. He refuses to decrease his seven-room flat and treats bolsheviks on the housing committee with unveiled contempt.
The protege:
The professor's student.
Sharikov:
A prototype of typical lumpen proletariat. In the plot, it's a human-like creature grown up after professor put human heart into a dog. At first, the professor was very happy about his groundbreaking achievement in science but soon become horrified by very uncivilized behavior of Sharikov. Sharikov quickly catches up all habits and behavior from local lumpen proletarians and started reading communist literature.
Transcript:
The professor, his protege and Sharikov are having a lunch together.
Protege: No, no, no! You must tuck in your napkin
Sharikov: Why the hell should I?
Protege: I shall not allow you to eat until you tuck on your napkin
Protege: Zina, take the plate away from Sharikov
Sharikov: Hey! How do you mean take away??
Protege: And use a fork please
Professor: Thank you! I'm sick and tired of reprimanding him
Sharikov: I will have some vodka
Protege: Don't you think you have had enough?
Sharikov: Do you grudge it?
Protege: You, Sharikov, are talking nonsense. The most revolting thing is that you talk with such confidence and assuredness
Protege: I don't grudge you vodka of course, all the more so since it's not mine but belongs to the Professor
Protege: It's simply that it's bad for you. That's number one. And number two: you can't behave yourself even without vodka
Protege: It's not done that way. You should first offer it to the Professor, then to me, then pour yourself a glass
Sharikov: You always act just as if you were on parade here
Sharikov: Put your napkin here, place your tie there and "excuse me" and "please-merci"
Sharikov: Why can't you behave naturally? You torment yourselves as though you were still under the Tsar
Professor: What do you mean by 'natural' may I ask?
Sharikov: I wish you all...
Protege: The same to you
Professor: An old habit!
Professor: There is nothing we can do about it... Klim Chugunkin [a man whose heart they put into a dog who now became Sharikov]
Protege: Do you think so, Professor?
Professor: No need to think, it is clear as it is
Sharikov: I will have some more vodka
Protege: Well now, what are you and I going to do this evening?
Sharikov: Let's go to the circus. I like it best of all
Professor: If I were you I would go to the theater at least once
Sharikov: I won't go to the theater
Protege: Belching at the table spoils other people's appetites
Protege: Incidentally, why don't you like the theater?
Sharikov: Hell, it's just crap... talk, talk
Sharikov: Pure counter-revolution!
Protege: You should do some reading, otherwise you know
Sharikov: Sure, I'm reading already!
Professor: Zina, take the vodka away, please
Professor: What have you been reading? Robinson Crusoe?
Sharikov: That what do you call it... correspondence between Engel's and... hell. What's the hell his name? Oh... Kautsky
Professor: I would be interested to know what comment you can make on what you have read?
Sharikov: I don't agree
Professor: With whom? Engel's or Kautsky?
Sharikov: With either of them
Professor: That is most remarkable, my God
Professor: Well, what would you suggest for your part?
Sharikov: Why suggest? They just keep writing... some congress and some Germans... Makes my head reel!
Sharikov: Take everything and divide it equally!
Professor: Just as I thought, just what I expected!
Protege: Do you know how it is to be done?
Sharikov: How to do it? That's plain enough
Sharikov: What do you think? Here is one guy who spreads himself out in seven rooms and has forty pairs of pants
Sharikov: ... and there is another who hangs around garbage cans looking for something to eat
Professor: I suppose that remark about the seven rooms is a hint at me?
Professor: All right, I've nothing against a fair division. How many patients did you turn away yesterday, Protege?
Protege: Thirty-nine
Professor: Three hundred and ninety rubles. You, Sharikov, owe hundred and thirty rubles. Kindly hand it over
Sharikov: Hey, wait a minute! What's that for??
Professor: I mean for the cat and the tap!
Professor: For the intolerable chaos you created yesterday and because of which I had to cancel my reception!
Professor: A man goes leaping about the house, like a savage ripping off taps! Who killed the cat? Who??
Professor: You stand on the lowest ring of evolution! You are still in the formative stage!
Professor: You are intellectually weak as yet! All your actions are purely animal!
Professor: Yet, you allow yourself in the presence of two university-educated men to offer advice of cosmic scale!
Professor: ... and of equally cosmic stupidity, about how everything should be divided up!
Professor: ... and at the same time you eat toothpaste