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The original was posted on /r/AmItheAsshole by /u/N3vRm0R on 2023-07-31 01:08:08.
I was dating a new guy, I kept him away from my children for the first few months (he is my first serious relationship since separating). One weekend, he just didn’t go home. I waited a day or 2 and asked him what was going on. He admitted he had lost his job, which his home was tied to and asked if he could stay a couple weeks. I agreed but made it clear he could not stay and I didn’t want weekday drinking or drunkenness around the kids (I drink when they aren’t home or special occasions). He proceeded to get drunk every day. Even my son’s birthday, I asked him to please not drink until the kids left. He got nasty with me that this is his routine, and he would do what he wanted, so I said, do it somewhere else. I continued to feel like he was always talking down to me, combating me on things, and I pointed it out and how it was making me feel defensive. That I felt like he was trying to make me small. He argued that he was just asserting himself because he felt like he had to bend to my plans (like my son’s birthday). Well today he was Drunk AF by 10am. While I’m trying to pack myself and the kids for camping and get my school work done. I left for a bit for a teddy bear picnic with the kids and came back to him passed out on the couch so the kids couldn’t play. I woke him up and told him it was inappropriate and to atleast go sleep it off in a bedroom so the kids didn’t have to see that shit. He was pissed because I had no right to wake him up angry (I only got angry because he was so drunk it was extremely difficult to wake him up). I tried to use my air compressor to fill up my tire. He called me stupid because obviously the plug I plugged it into didn’t work, I tried to say I know it works, I just had lights on plugged into it. He got made at me for challenging him (this is the kind of thing he had been doing the last 2 weeks, I would do something, around my house! With my stuff! And he would try to tell me to do it differently, and I would say what my experience was and he would get all pissy that I am arguing with him. Or he would be doing something with my stuff, and I would offer my knowledge and he would say I was talking down to him). Well it turns out he had shut to pump off. That why the compressor wasn’t filling up. As I knew the outlets were fine. After he had called me stupid, I whispered ‘dont talk to me like that, especially in front of my kids’. He yelled at me to not talk to him like that. And that ‘he’s not the one who came in me to make them’. This was my last straw, I told him to get the F out of my house. He didn’t. He went to sleep in my bed, I made him leave. Now he is blaming me saying that this is all because I have unresolved issues with my ex. He is trying to make me believe that his behaviour was acceptable and that I am over reacting. And that I had no right to be mad. AITA?
Edit: he did get another job right away. I wrote the slow start of assholery off as him being depressed about his situation. But it kept getting worse. He is out. I just needed confirmation that I wasn’t over reacting.