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The original was posted on /r/AmItheAsshole by /u/Dreygoryn on 2023-07-29 17:11:20.
So, after having a very long talk, Taylor and I managed to make up. I confronted her about her outburst towards me and the neglect of house chores, but I tried to keep my tone softer than intended, seeing that she looked pretty depressed. During our conversation, I learned that Tristan had been pressuring her to learn cooking from his mother and online to make their dinners more enjoyable. She explained that she was trying, but her busy schedule with work and school made it hard to find time for cooking lessons. Last week, for the first time ever, she attempted to cook something for their weekly dinner (I wasn’t at home, so I didn’t know), but unfortunately, it ended up burnt and with other mistakes.
She felt awful about not being able to cook, and after our incident, she felt hurt by Tristan appreciating my food instead of being understanding about her struggles. Taylor mentioned that she wasn’t necessarily jealous of me, but she felt like Tristan didn’t care about her feelings when he kept complimenting my cooking despite knowing her insecurities on this topic. She apologized for blowing up on me and acknowledged that her actions with neglecting chores just to annoy me were wrong. During our conversation, she mentioned that she finds my food to be smelly, and the kitchen retains the food odor for a long time after cooking. I assured her that I would take measures to minimize the lingering smells by opening windows while cooking and using air fresheners afterward to neutralize any strong odors.
I also offered to teach her a few simple recipes when she has some spare time, hoping it would make her feel better about cooking. I emphasized the importance of cooking for herself and her well-being rather than just for her boyfriend, as her current eating habits weren’t healthy for her body. I even offered to show her my meal prep routine, which would allow her to spend less time cooking and still have food ready in the fridge when she gets home. In the end, I believe we are on good terms now. I want to thank everyone for their comments and support throughout this situation.