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The original was posted on /r/AmItheAsshole by /u/LizzieMariaFaye on 2023-07-28 18:46:42.
So a bit of background, my mom and bio dad had me when they were 17 and 19. My bio dad did drugs and was all around a thug. My mother took him to court when I was four because when I came back from him having me over the weekend I rolled grass in a leaf and pretended to smoke it because “that’s what daddy does”. She really only wanted him to get to keep me at my grandparents instead of taking me to random strangers places when he had his parenting time (he didn’t have his own place and couch surfed). But he never even showed up and so she was awarded sole custody by default. After that he would call on my birthday once every few years and randomly show up and want to spend time with me once in a blue moon. Never came to birthday parties, never went to school plays, my high school or college graduation or basically any life event. He’s a relative stranger. I’m 26 now and all of a sudden he’s “found Jesus”, mended his ways and is getting married. He called and texted multiple times begging me to come to his wedding and how it would mean so much to him if I was there for his big day but all I could think about was that he never came to any of my big days or was any sort of parent at all. He wouldn’t even know what my favorite food was or if I was allergic to anything if you asked him. I ignored everything and didn’t go. But now I feel bad because maybe I’m being bitter and hateful and I should just learn to forgive him. So I need a third party opinion.