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The original was posted on /r/cfb by /u/Pollaski on 2024-07-22 15:23:01+00:00.
The Tank Job of the Week is an award for the FBS team that did the best job of humiliating itself over the weekend. Whether they blew a large lead, choked away a spot in the limelight, lost a game they had absolutely no right losing, or completely screwed everything on a last second blunder, the TJOTW winner sets the gold standard in college football misery. Over the next seven weeks, we are counting down my 100 greatest tank jobs over the last 20 years. WARNING: You will be hurt.
(video links and a link to the entire list in comments)
78: WISCONSIN BADGERS (lost to Arizona State 32-30) [2013]
When 2013 Arizona State is brought up, what most people invariably think of is The Kiffining- the 62-41 beatdown they gave USC in week 5 that resulted in head coach Lane Kiffin being “tarmacked” in a tiny little LAX office. That’s a little unfair to limit ASU’s season like that- the Sun Devils were dark horse Pac-12 South Champions, before falling to Stanford in the Pac-12 title game. And then there’s this little gem, a masterclass of the desert voodoo that has claimed many a Big Ten team over the years (see, its not just the PNW!).
The defending Big Ten champions came into this Week 3 contest having not yet given up a point in their first two games- forty-something point romps over Massachusetts and Tennessee Tech. That scoreless streak would be broken eleven minutes in when Arizona State kicked a field goal. Wisconsin fought back with two touchdowns within a minute of each other thanks to a scoop and score to go up 14-3, but Arizona closed the gap with a touchdown of their own and a field goal to end the half just a point down. Wisconsin opened the second half with a 80 yard rushing touchdown on the first play (Melvin Gordon III was a monster in this game and would finish with 193 yards and 2 TDs). ASU responded with a touchdown late in the quarter, but failed the two point conversion to go to the final frame down 21-19. After a Wisconsin field goal, ASU scored twice on consecutive drives to take a 32-24 lead. Wisconsin responded with a touchdown with just under five minutes to go, but failed their own 2-point conversion, making it 32-30. But they forced an ASU punt, took over at their own 17, and drove all the way down to the ASU 13 yardline. And that’s when things got bizarre.
With eighteen seconds left, Badger QB Joel Stave took the snap, moved towards the middle of the field, and started to kneel the ball, but was bumped into by his own lineman. He never ended up kneeling- just simply set the ball on the ground then started urging his team to line up to spike the ball and bring on the winning FG kick. But an Arizona State player dove onto the ball, apparently thinking it was a fumble, and by the time the refs got him off and reset the ball, time had ran out. ASU was the winner, and the Badgers were outraged. That this all went down at like 1AM Central Time only seemed to heighten the insanity.
I said this the night of, and I will continue to die on this hill: Wisconsin screwed Wisconsin. No I don’t believe that ASU player really thought it was a fumble and yes it should have perhaps been delay of game. But here’s the thing- its risky to even be kneeling with just eighteen seconds and no timeouts, but had Stave simply knelt the ball, tossed it to the official (who has to reset the ball anyways), gathered his team, and spiked, the Badgers likely would have stopped the clock and had a chance to kick a 32 yarder to escape the Valley of the Sun. Instead, he got cute, and there is no place for cute in football. But as enraged as Badger fans were, things were about to get worse… a LOT worse.
At 1:18 AM Madison time, a single word- #karma – was tweeted out by Jen Bielema, wife of former Wisconsin and then-Arkansas coach Bret Bielema. Bielema had left Madison for the Hogs during the offseason, and to say the divorce was not an amiable one was an understatement. The tweet rose Badger-rage from incendiary to flat out nuclear- and again, this was all happening in the middle of the night!. Hilariously, Arkansas would be stunned by Rutgers the following week, and then proceed to go 0-8 in SEC play, making the #karma tweet one of the greatest “aged like milk” moments in college football history.
As for the Badgers, they took their rage out on poor Purdue the following week in a 41-10 beatdown, and went on to have a respectable 9-4 season, finishing ranked 21st after a Citrus Bowl loss to a top-10 South Carolina.
77: NC STATE WOLF PACK (lost to North Carolina 43-35) [2012]
I once read that the most arrogant thing a football coach could do is buy a house. Obviously its an exaggeration, but it is an indication of just how fleeting coach employment can be- for every coach who’s tenure lasts a generation, there seems to be twenty that don’t even make it to the end of their initial contract. And even a coach who becomes established in their position can be just a couple of bad games away from the hot seat. Remember Dan Mullen in 2021? He was thought fairly safe right up until Florida was obliterated by South Carolina, and his seat went to scorching over night, to fired within a month.
I looked through several hot seat watches for the 2012 season, and the only one I saw that even mentioned Tom O’Brien was ESPN’s, which rated all coaches job security on a scale of 1 to 5, and put O’Brien at a 2. And why not? The Wolfpack were coming off an 8-5 season, and had gone 9-4 the previous year. And the Wolfpack did lose a couple early in the season- an opener to what turned out to be a pretty bad Tennessee team, and a tough one against Miami. But they also had a monster win over #3 Florida State, and were sitting 5-2 when they rolled into Chapel Hill to face their hated Tar Heel rivals, who were 5-3 coming off a loss to Duke.
UNC started the game on fire, rolling out to an early 25-7 lead. NC State responded with three straight touchdowns, taking a 28-25 lead into the half. Both teams were moving the ball well with over 500 yards of offense each, but turnovers plagued both sides, particularly the Wolfpack, who coughed up four to UNC’s two. Nonetheless, the Pack added a touchdown in the third quarter to go up ten, but UNC responded on their next drive to pull back within 3. Then, just 4:28 left on the clock, UNC embarked on a monster drive that got to the State 7, but a devastating sack on third down would force a 34 yard field goal to tie the game at 35-all with just 1:24 left. State would have one last shot to win in regulation.
But QB mike Glennon was sacked on first down, setting up 2nd and 17, and O’Brien elected to simply run the ball, seemingly playing for OT despite two remaining UNC timeouts and a surety that they would be giving UNC decent field position. UNC burned their last timeout after third down, stopping the clock at thirty seconds, and State lined up to punt, with future Cincinnati Bengal Giovani Bernard lined up to return. Bernard caught the punt at his own 37, sped away from the State gunner closing in on him, and sprinted down the sideline, untouched as the Carolina blockers formed an effective wall to keep the Pack chasers at bay, and trotted into the endzone with thirteen seconds left as Kenan Memorial Stadium went crazy. NC State would fumble the ensuing kickoff, icing the game, and criticism would fall heavily on O’Briens shoulders for both his conservative play and the execution of the fatal punt return.
NC State would get destroyed by Virginia on homecoming the next week, 33-6, get boatraced by Clemson 62-48 two weeks later, and limp to a 7-6 finish with a 38-24 loss to Vanderbilt in the Music City Bowl. Tom O’Brien was fired the day after their regular season finale to Boston College, and while it was never specifically indicated that this game was the reason, the bottling against UNC and the ensuing blowout by Virginia were clearly the worst two losses on their schedule and likely the reasons for his dismissal. For UNC, they’d finish 8-4 with a share of the Coastal division title, but were banned from postseason play due to NCAA sanctions.
TOMORROW: A food-based bowl so wretched it makes anything the Duke’s Mayo Bowl subjects us to look appetizing. And the Tank Job That Didn’t Matter (but it still made the list!)