I used to hang out with this guy, We called him fat pat Because he was a short fat guy who’s name is Patrick. So anyway one time about 15 years ago right around when my brother got out of the Marine Corps we were all getting drunk. We had a lot of beer and then somebody brought This big cake with green frosting all over it. So anyway after a night of heavy drinking we all went to bed however fat pat woke up in the middle of the night completely hammered, Proceeded to go upstairs from the basement where we were drinking which was my room at the time and devour the entire cake but not like in a regular manner like an absolute savage. When we woke up the next morning and I didn’t even sleep in my bedroom that night I slept on the couch upstairs fat pat was on the floor in the basement half naked covered in like Half melted green cake frosting and all kinds of other weird shit. The entire kitchen looked like a green cake had exploded in it. Apparently after eating this entire cake he got the idea that he was going to go outside and walk around the neighborhood. You saw where he left green cake all over the door knob, green cake on a stop sign that he must’ve tried wiping his hands on, green cake all over the fence that he climbed then green cake on the side of my neighbors house. Then he got the idea that he was going to wash the green cake off so he jumped into my above ground pool outback that had not been used in many years. I mean that thing was disgusting, It was filled with like rotted leaves and all kinds of weird algae Probably some dead birds and the squirrels who fricken knows. Then to top it all off he busted open the screen window into the basement crawled his fat ass in Took off half his clothes and passed out with his Wang doodle hanging out. Why am I telling you the story I have no idea but I wanted you to laugh.
I saw a guy throw up on a stripper once. He was drinking while on some medication. I look down the catwalk and there was the stripper wiping off her leg. They earn those dollar bills....
mayonesa@wolfballs.com 2 years ago
This is the kind of drinking that we all aspire to.
wigglehard@wolfballs.com 2 years ago
It was New England around 2007 all there was to do is drink and watch football