I’d say Minecraft’s multiplayer experience is close to what Anon describes as “good multiplayer”, probably because it hasn’t changed much in 15 years - there’s not even an in game server browser (at least on the Java edition), and playing Minecraft in and of itself is usually a big time commitment so you’re more encouraged to find a couple of servers you like and stick to them.

However, the last time that I feel like I integrated into a server’s community was 4 years ago - a blank server list doesn’t really encourage you to go looking for more, and it’s been harder to commit time as I get older and have more responsibilities (that I ignore anyways, but still).

I think Lethal Company also has a lobby system without matchmaking, but I haven’t played it so I don’t really know.