I don’t actually have anything to moan about this week, because I’m off on holiday.

I’m sitting in airport departure lounge, drinking an overpriced pint of Stella, breathing in that sweet recycled air, surrounded by people ignorant of anything but what they’re shambling towards directly in-front of them.

Zero arguments, zero stress, airport security did not steal my hair product, nor did they take a scan of my balls using their big machine.

What so you mean I sound overly sarcastic? It’s all been gravy. I’m relaxed because I’m on bloody holiday.