Totally agree with the conflict-avoidance answer. A small reframing: making mistakes is perfectly normal. A lie is usually an attempt to skip owning one.
What makes you a mature person is:
- Acknowledge it to yourself: nobody is perfect.
- Plan the recovery: there’s a fix for everything but death. An honest apology is often most of it.
- Own the fix: you dropped the bricks, so you pick them up. Don’t wait for someone else to do it.
- Learn from it: making a mistake is fine, repeating it isn’t.
A lie turns one mistake into two, and the second one is harder to undo.
Wildmimic@anarchist.nexus 2 hours ago
That’s me. I absolutely fear being judged and getting involved in any conflict thanks to my childhood, and this sometimes - especially if i have to answer quickly and don’t have time to reflect - makes me lie before i really even think about it. Lying at home about pretty much everything was the only way i able to have a semi-normal life in my teenage years, and it becomes a second nature if you have to do it on the regular.
Nowadays i try to take my time, to give myself the breathing room and space i need to feel safe enough to be honest. Wouldn’t work without years of therapy.