That’s an American modification. Here’s a more accurate translation, conveniently without a double negative:

I told my wife yesterday

She cried all day long.

Since I’m the sole breadwinner

I know it’s crazy, but I want to have a baby and live a cozy, happy life together.

Even if it’s not a total life turnaround, I just wanted to catch a break

I tried investing with borrowed money, but completely fucked it up

I somehow managed to comfort my wife

We decided to just struggle, just the two of us, without having a baby

and just live paying off our debts.

I’ve scheduled my vasectomy for next week, so I can’t take any more questions.