NTA. Your husband was showing you who he is and how he views women (and perhaps, you). Your son deserves better. He needs support in understanding both his feelings and how his parents would have him behave. If you have not had ‘the talk’ with him. Now is your chance to tell him that relationships are far more about communication than anatomy. Dad may be a lost cause, but continue to tell him when you disagree with him. He is unlikely to re-think his attitude unless he hears from you that disagree.